Slow Death

Slow Death

Another day begins
Time to perform the morning ritual
He forced himself to rise
It wouldn't do to keep him waiting
For as long as he could remember it had been the same
Everyday he had watched him die slowly, piece by piece
First he cleaned and dressed him, readying him for another day
When he was through he had time to think back, to review the years
The slow death
First his innocence had died, the betrayal
He remembered how the look in those eyes changed
He was the only one trusted after that
After all, he was responsible for keeping him alive
The ideals went next
Crushed out by the realization of how the world really worked
Somewhere in there the self-respect had died too
Oh, he had turnedbitter
Hating everyone because he hated himself
He didn't like him when he was like that
Trust was hard for him to give
At times he was the only one trusted
Every day a little more of him died
The gleam in his eyes slowly dimming
It seemed he was the only one who noticed
Well, living with him for so long, he recognized the signs
The suicide attempt
That was a close one
He had let his vigilance waver
Before he knew it he was taking the pills
He was lucky then
Where would he be without him
Those were the longest days
When he only confided in him and no others
The hate and distrust had eaten away at him for so long
And love was something to hear about, never to feel
How could anyone love anything in so evil a world
Even he felt that his existence was only barely tolerated
Some days he felt that surely he would be struck down
But that had passed in time
Slowly the burning hate had cooled and died
But not before burning away his emotions
That was when the wall had become noticeable
The old gleam was still there, barely peeking through cracks in the mortar
What little of the old being that lived on turned to helping others
But he still refused to help himself
Eventually love did come to him in force
Seeing the gleam return to those eyes was good
But he loved one who loved another
He watched, sadly, as the gleam faded once again
Knowing that the wall was growing
It was a ridiculous circumstance, but he had failed to see the humor
Well, it was time to be moving on
He examined the eyes one last time
Desperately trying to find that old gleam
Hoping that some small part of the spirit still lived on
There!
No, no that wasn't it
It was just light reflecting off of the mirror

-megazone, being reflective, 7/19/92